Break

I want to go on an adventure soooo bad. I want to be in a different country, or a different state even. No parents please, that takes the excitement out of everything. I want to meet people that I'll probably never see again. I hate living so inside of my comfort zone constantly, it's definitely nice to have but I'm bored.

I used to like cold weather, now I don't know. I feel like it keeps me in so much. Maybe if I had a jacket I'd go out more, but then I know there's no where to go. I don't have all that much money...always and I'm sick of the same thing all the time. I can only take this for so much longer, when summer comes I am making things change.

I want to read The Catcher in the Rye, I think I'm gonna go buy it today. Ugh but so little money. Whatever, I really need to start cutting back on cigarettes anyway.

I never want to go to college.

"I couldn't wait til I got home to pass the time in my room alone .. "

Fatlip

Sports all day for the past two days, if I keep this up I'm going to be completely covered in bruises by the end of the week. I like it though, baseball and soccer and basketball.

It's hot down here. I wish I had some money. I need cigerettes, I need to smoke, gah. I'm gonna rob my mom when I get a chance.
I miss Tom<3

It's been a while

I'm a little ticked off right now.
REASONS:
The new cleaning lady is coming today and I have to talk to her and direct her, and she hardly speaks english. AGH.
My mom is a selfish food shopper and I hate this organic shit.
Actualllly, I don't mind organic shit, I just hate this organic shit.

Last night I threw up again. I think I have to go back to only drinking sparks, I can't handle drinking beer or liquor and smoking obviously. Its cause I don't know my perfect mixture. Drinking and smoking has a very fine line, I cross it way too often. But this time I contained my puke to the bathroom and nobody knew, wo0p.

I dropped an entire 40 today in my kitchen. Kabloom beer and ugly brown glass everywhere. Good thing this new cleaning lady is coming, gross sticky floor.

goood mood

now

I love relying on myself
I will be writing in this a lot though :)

idjhweipjf

Fuck everyone.
Lets all believe what we want
or whats more convienent
or easier to believe


Maybe we should swallow our pride
and believe what is true
instead

This isnt fucking shakespeare
just so you know
Even though I fucking wish I was an evil genius
and I wish I could get my hands on some poison
or a shotgun

Theres nothing for me to be jealous of
LOTS OF HOLES
and your retarded.

It's not all coming together, it's not coming any time soon. I'm sick of optimism for no reason, in other people at least. I'm sick of profile quotes stating that everything happens for a reason, I'm sick of karma, or the lack of. Karma isn't real. Not every thing happens for a reason, people make up reasons that things could of happened for. Bad people get fucked and so do good people and so do regular people. There is no reason for exsistence, theres just exsistence.

SICKSICKSICK

Sooooo ridiculous. How can someone just fucking lie and lie and lie and lie and keep lieing like a pyscho. Give uppppp. It's so fucking annoying and pathetic. I fucking hate people.