Last Chance To Lose Your Keys

"It's boys like you that make me think
I'm better off home on a Saturday night..."

I miss my best friend. I like his new girlfriend, shes really nice and I'm happy for him but I miss him in more ways than one. I feel like hes been different the past 2 weeks, the 2 times that I've seen him. I hope this whole being so wrapped up in his girlfriend thing doesn't last long. I don't want them to break up, I just hope he learns to balance. I feel replaced, even though I was never anything like his girlfriend and most deffinitley never wanted to be, I had that opportunity many times. I don't know about this whole thing, but it seems to fit a pattern in my life lately.

I don't think I can handle a relationship. I don't know how I did it in the past, but I look at other peoples relationships and not all of them, but a lot of them seem to be so unbalanced. Some people act as if the only other person on the planet is their significant other. I don't want to make someone my entire life. There are people in normal relationships too, ofcourse. They seem to balance everything well and what not, but agh. I don't think I could even like anyone so much, so consistantly for very long.

My manager bought everyone at work pizza today. He's one of those people who act like they hate everyone, but then do something nice like that. My lungs are shot shot shot. I ran to my house and back to work, I live 2 blocks away, I'm still weezing and coughing. I'm disgusting. I smoke tooooo much. I smoke too much pot too. I hope my brain doesn't disapear.